Redskins coach Mike Shanahan has told media that Clinton Portis will not need surgery for the separation of what his running back delicately referred to as his "up above the private spot" (translation: groin).
Problem is, the injury will sideline Portis for four to six weeks.
Not to state the obvious, but that's a lot of football to miss as a newly-snaps-sharing "old" guy. And today the Redskins, clearly interested in poking about for fresh possibilities, signed former University of Miami running back and injury specialist Javarris James to their practice squad.
Shanahan also said a move would be made to ensure three running backs will be available Sunday. With the apparent emergence of Ryan Torain, could this be the end of CP as we know him?
Say what you will about Portis -- and you do -- it's a question too depressing to ponder. James may help fill the unspoken quota of former Hurricanes in burgundy and gold, but he's a lot more boring -- and neither he nor Torain nor any other back in Shanahan's arsenal can block like CP.
But that's getting ahead of ourselves. Portis' bathing suit area may be separated, but it didn't fall off. And according to Portis, the party who suffers most from the injury may not be the Redskins or even Portis himself.
Holden Kusnher: "So, the ladies of D.C. are obviously concerned, is that a correct assumption?"
Clinton Portis: "They out of commission, unless they got a backup plan."
Somewhere, would-be backup plan Javarris James raises a hand, a look of hope on his face.