There really isn't a bad time to be allowed that wonderful image of having your wife cutting off your penis with a steak knife while you sleep. Ahhhh, memories.
John Wayne Bobbitt, the gentleman (we can still call him a man, right?) that lost more than half his 9-iron in that "Sweeney Todd" experiment has decided that his autobiography might not be weird enough, agreeing to fight Greg Smith, the barber that punched out Marion "Suge" Knight during a street-fight in Hollywood.
Norm Clarke of the Las Vegas Review Journal is reporting the two are set to fight on November 15.
Bobbitt, 41, is training for a Nov. 15 celebrity boxing match in Philadelphia against Smith, the barber who made news in May when he knocked out rap mogul Knight during a street altercation in Hollywood.
Bobbitt was scheduled to fight Joey Buttafuoco in a televised celebrity match several years ago, but the event fell apart. Earlier this year, Bobbitt agreed to slug it out with former baseball star Jose Canseco, but the promoter switched to former NFL player and BYU standout Vai Sikahema, who pounded the beefier Canseco into carpaccio.
Has Bobbitt not learned his lesson in life? Honestly, you have been trying to set up a celebrity fight for years and the one you go with is against a barber that is trained in scissors!! How has this not registered? That would be like Evander Holyfield agreeing to a fight with a professional ear biter.
The story of Bobbitt has really been obscure over the years. Since the penis-chopping incident (that pains me just to type it), the man has been a minister, in a few pornos (my favorite, John Wayne Bobbitt: Uncut), in and out of jail on a number of different offenses, and even started a band called "The Severed Parts."
As for Smith, there isn't a ton on him except this YouTube video where he talks in his barbershop about how he only has a few weeks to live and how he has a bounty on his head and uses a few choice words to explain all of this.
Also, this is just a little bit of a personal note I'd like to extend to all the readers of the world. When you are researching a story about the Bobbitts, never, EVER Google Image Search his name. Don't ever do it. It is 10:42 AM right now and I'm basically scouring my desk for any sharp object to gouge my eyes out with.