Welcome to Watch List, where we identify five things on TV to watch while you stay at home and try to survive this wretched, awful heat wave. I went outside to day and stepped in a puddle. Turned out it was liquid cat. Stay inside if you can, people. It’s for the best. LET’S GO!
LOUIE – 11:00PM (FX) “Louie” premiered with back-to-back episodes last week and instantly became must-see television. It’s not like any comedy you’ve seen before. In fact, I’m not even sure it’s a comedy. It’s FUNNY, but it’s not always a comedy. It’s also incredibly haphazard. It’s virtually story-free, filled instead with quick vignettes and cuts of CK doing bits at the legendary Comedy Cellar in the Village. Yet, by watching this show, I now know I’d rather eat cement than try and raise a child in New York City. Man, that just looks painful in every way. Anyway, give “Louie” a shot this evening. ANTICIPATION: GO FOR IT ALREADY!
RESCUE ME – 10:00PM (FX) Few shows on TV depict alcoholism as accurately as “Rescue Me”. Too many shows depict alcoholics as melodramatic goons who are almost always acting out violently or passed out. But that’s not, in my experience, the way most alcoholics are. Most alcoholics are relatively functional. And most drink because they thoroughly enjoy drinking, and the way they bond with friends and family while sharing a drink. “Rescue Me” gets that. It shows you how an alcoholic can get away with treating drinking so casually, even as their problems begin to mount up. And man alive, does Tommy Gavin have some problems. ANTICIPATION: BOOZE!
HELL’S KITCHEN – 8:00PM (FOX) Tonight, the chefs are expected to prepare dinner for a dinner theater. There can’t be anything on Earth more depressing than a dinner theater. Do they really still exist? Would you ever go to one? If you found yourself trapped in one, wouldn’t you blast your way out with a shotgun? The only thing they serve at a dinner theater is sadness. ANTICIPATION: CHRIS KLEIN IS WILLIE LOMAN IN “DEATH OF A SALESMAN”!
IT’S EFFIN’ SCIENCE – 8:00PM (G4) It’s like Mr. Wizard, only with half-swearing! ANTICIPATION: EFFIN’ POTATO CANNONS!
WAREHOUSE 13 – 9:00PM (SyFy – an NBC/Universal network) The season premiere of this original SyFy series. And please take time to note that SyFy original series and SyFy original movies are two totally different things. SyFy series are usually pretty high quality. SyFy movies have Sharktopuses fighting Tiffany. Big difference. ANTICIPATION: SAUL RUBINEK!