Jason Taylor had it rough. The former Skin had an unbearable burden last year, a cross he bore all on his own in a city he didn't love. How sad.
You might remember Taylor from the prancing he did on "Dancing with the Stars." Supposedly he suited up for the Skins last season, but there's barely any actual evidence of that beyond the 3.5 number in the sack column.
How did he feel about his time in D.C.? "It felt like five years, to be honest," he told the Miami Herald.
Cue the tiny violins!
Taylor blames his down season on the Skins. "Everyone should know I'm not a left end; I'm not a five-technique left end, it's just not what I do well."
While that's a bit of an indictment of the team's scouting operation -- way to go, Vinny! -- there's no acknowledgment that some of the failures were his own. He was 34, with a bad knee, coming off an offseason where he spent more time dancing around in frilly costumes, contemplating being the next Hollywood action star and sniping with the Big Tuna in Miami.
Was he really playing and working as hard as he possibly could? Probably not, but the man's ego isn't going to admit that.
It was his over-sized ego that led him to the Skins anyway. He didn't want to eat any salary or accept a different role in Miami, since he believed he was the same superstar he was when he was on the good side of 30.
What else did the prima donna not like? D.C.'s snow. You remember the great blizzards last year?
Good riddance. Vinny Cerrato's brilliance strikes again.
The Skins didn't really need the second-rounder anyway, right?
Chris Needham used to write Capitol Punishment. Unlike Taylor, he cannot dance.