Based on its track record, Shop NHL knows what women want about as well as the first guy eliminated on "Beauty and the Geek." Remembering the $325 purse made from two recycled aluminum license plates and hundreds of Swarovski crystals?
Remember that ruthless critique of Alyssa Milano's fashion line for the NHL, including a sexy frock with a team name "written so small across the center of your breasts that he won't be able to read it until he's gotten inappropriately close?"
Well, the new Shop NHL catalogues hit many mailboxes yesterday, and it appears the League is trying to move women's couture beyond those awful pink jerseys. As you can see, we have "Rbk Women's Silver Ice Jerseys" available in white or black, and "Rbk HerShield Jerseys" that are grey, pastel and can be customized. Oh, and they also have "sugar glitter" that decorates the jersey.
("HerShield?" Hockey jersey or female contraceptive? You make the call!)
The Neanderthals here at Puck Daddy felt these sweaters are rather attractive. Nothing beats a female puckhead rocking a real jersey, but if you're going down the road of "fashion jerseys" then these certainly beat the ones that appeared to be extracting from Paris Hilton's cerebral cortex.
But we're men. Manly men. Wrap Around Curl is a snarky woman and a huge hockey fan. And she's rather underwhelmed by the NHL's new female gear:
The NHL is still full of fail when it comes to producing merch for the ladies. Will you look at this nonsense? That is the most emo jersey of my life. GREY?! For serious?! Ugh, that is the most pathetic attempt for team colors. So us ladies stamp our foot down and proclaim "death to the pink jersey" and you decide that baby blue is a suitable alternative?
For blog, this jersey is making me want to slash my wrists while I listen to some Dashboard wearing beat up Converse shirts from the baby Gap. Hey NHL, you're bad ideas are everywhere and they are screaming bat[poop] insanity, and you don't care. Oh look, still in pink. Check out the jerseys at the top, THEY HAVE GLITTER. Because the menfolk know that ladies love sparkly [poop]. Yeah that's right, I want an effing four carat ring. I want a Sidekick III like Paris Hilton that is pink and purple and looks like the Swarvoski Crystal Fairy vomited on it. And I want scented body shimmer so I can shine like a Vegas hooker. Because I am a lady and that is how I show support for my team.
Uh ... wow. We totally feel like the guy whose wife calls an outfit at the mall "totally slutty" right after we said, "I don't know, honey, I think it looks kind of sharp."