Nats RP Crushes Swine Flu 10 Pigs at a Time

Kensing hunts pigs from helicopter

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Nats fans don't have to worry about swine flu.

New Nats reliever Logan Kensing likes to go a-huntin' for some hogs -- as relayed by the Bog.

Kensing manages five ranches in Texas along with an old teammate.  As part of the land management program, he's ridden up high in a helicopter, blasting away at as many pigs as he can.  He's a one-man swine flu prevention artist.

The hogs he hunts aren't Joe Jacoby or Russ Grimm, but the ugly, wild, land-terrorizing kind. 

He told ESPN, "I'm not going to lie. It's bad-ass. It's one of the best things I've ever got to do. From a management standpoint, we're doing a month's work in two hours."

BLAM!  Take that, Porky.

When news of Kensing's activities first broke, protests (no surprise) followed.

And so did the angry letters: "I believe many Marlins fans share our outrage at these statements, and are not comfortable knowing that the money they pay for tickets to see the Marlins, will be used in part by their pitcher to finance his sadistic pleasure in terrifying and then killing innocent animals in such a non-sporting way."

Some argue, though, that the hog-blasting is a necessary evil to protect the natural environment from the non-native species.

Either way, with the tensions of human-porcine relations at an all-time high, perhaps we should give Mr. Kensing a little leeway -- anything to keep the flu away!

But if you're a beloved, cross-dressing football fan, known for your rubbery noses and flowery dresses, you just might want to keep one eye on the sky.

Chris Needham used to write about Capitol Punishment.  He has a hankerin' for some porkchops.

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