“Natinals” Finally Finish First in Something

Team is No. 1! ... in ESPN's list of things sports can do without

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The Washington Nationals must have been considering breaking out the champagne they have had on ice since 1981 when they found out they were ranked No. 1, until they found out it was in the list of things that sports, not just baseball, could do without.

Sure, the beloved Natinals have had a few missteps this season: The infamous tarp incident, the misspelling of their own name on the jersey, winning only 13 games by the beginning of June ... but No. 1?!

Whoever compiled this list apparently doesn't value having an entire seating section to themselves -- lots of leg room for cozy spectating.

The hardest part to swallow is what was deemed more important than the Nationals. The Detroit Lions only made the list at 41 despite winning 0 percent of their games last year while the Nationals have at least won 30 percent. Or how about Charles Barkley at 48? Ryan Zimmerman could make much better cell phone commercials.

But let's focus on the positive shall we. Instead of tearing down the Nationals, we've compiled five Canadian contributions to sports better than the former Montreal Expos. They are as follows:

  • Steve Nash: Everyone's favorite Vitamin Water spokesman
  • Canadian Bacon: How else do you think Barry Bonds got so big?
  • Shania Twain: It's rumored Ovechkin warms up to "You're still the one"
  • The Zipper: Maybe we can invent a Zip-off rain tarp
  • Basketball: We think Gilbert Arenas would agree
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