Hide Every Copy of American Pie — Now!

Cue a rehashing of every band joke from American Pie in 3, 2, 1...

The University of Wisconsin marching band has been suspended indefinitely while allegations of hazing, alcohol abuse and sexual misconduct are investigated.

Seriously, the first person you even think will break out with, "So this one time at band camp..." Just preemptively smack them and save yourself from having to hear it 100 more times after this gets mentioned tomorrow morning on College GameDay.

The band will not play at tomorrow's game at Madison between Ohio State and Wisconsin. (Brief aside, does that mean there are 300 extra tickets for the game?)

Probably more surprising is that this is not the first time the Wisconsin band has been in trouble. They were put on probation in 2006 for similar issues.

At that time, seminude band members were alleged to have danced suggestively and there were reports of women being forced to kiss other women to be allowed to enter bathrooms on a bus.
The university said in a statement that the latest allegations were consistent with the 2006 troublesome behavior.