So online pirates don't really go for onscreen pirates, it seems.
Hollywood Reporter, by way of TorrentFreak, has a list of the top 10 most-pirated movies and Johnny Depp's high seas adventure "Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End" comes in a distant 10th. Taking the #1 spot handily to the tune of 21 million illegal downloads is James Cameron's space jungle romp "Avatar."
It's a little surprising that a movie sold almost entirely on the strength of is 3D, big screen experience is being viewed on computer monitors so frequently. Wasn't Real3D supposed to be a tool to fight online piracy and get people back into theaters? Waaaah...waaaaaaaaah. Between this and Sony's decision to start making theater-goers pony up extra cash for 3D glasses (read: Sony's decision to encourage people to steal 3D glasses), the whole third dimension thing seems to be on the wan. Just like, you know, the last time it was a craze for like a year.
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In between "Avatar" and "Pirates" are some surprising and not-so-surprising titles:
2. "The Dark Knight" (19 million) - What? Computer nerds like Batman? Hell you say.
3. "Transformers" (19 million) - What? They like robots, too?
4. "Inception" (18 million) - This one is probably 90% fueled by how good the movie is, and 10% by the popularity of "Inception"-themed internet memes. Yo dawg, I heard you liked dreams...
5. "The Hangover" (17 million) - Really? This thing is on cable on a continuous loop.
6. "Star Trek" (16 million) - Yawn.
7. "Kick-Ass" (15 million) - Wow, this one hurts. If even half of these pirates paid to see it, this criminally underrated movie might have had a more reflective box office.
8. "The Departed" (14 million) - "I'm the guy who pays to see movies. You must be the other guy."
9. "The Incredible Hulk" (14 million) - Enjoy it, Big Green. This is the only time you'll be on a Top 10 of anything list. You barely crack "Top 10 Hulk Movies and TV shows."
But remember, kids, only pirates pirate movies. No, wait...only you can prevent piracy? Um...One in every three high school girls will be pirated by the time they graduate? No...Pirating movies isn't normal, but on meth it is?
Look, you know there's some kind of slogan out there for this. Just stop it.