The Washington edition of MTV's perennial seven-person bildungsroman "The Real World" has turned the various local Internet webloggers into bloodthirsty grifting jackals, all wanting to confirm that 2000 S St. NW would be the location of the teenage participants' sex castle.
There were maintenance crews and outer space satellites being installed, after all. And paper covering the bottom floor windows! THAT'S WHERE THE OFFICES WOULD BE!
But MTV has been keeping its secrets, stubbornly, and will not let anyone know what they already know (unless, of course, this is the biggest red herring in D.C. history).
So after a weekend of bickering, the Washington Post's Reliable Source ladies took the daring step of... making a telephone call to the owner and developer of 2000 S Street NW. Sly!
So we did the old "reporter" thing and, you know, made a phone call to Doug Jemal, D.C. superdeveloper and owner of 2000 S St., most recently used as office space. Is MTV your new tenant? "I can't tell you that!" he said, laughing. But surely if it weren't you could tell us it's not, right? "I've been sworn to secrecy!" he said. We'll take that as a yes.
This sure sounds like a "slam dunk," but you can never be sure with these corporate-types. MTV has dealt with this before, and it's entirely likely that they've created an elaborate hoax on which the vultures may feast.
But if it's true... then everyone stock up on water balloons and go to 2000 S Street NW, for war.
Jim Newell writes for Wonkette and IvyGate.