Do not be confused, D.C. residents: the George W. Bush administration has not returned, and the Republicans are still a tiny minority in Congress. So why are you running into so many young (and old!) conservatives on the street and in Starbucks today? Why because it's CPAC season, of course!
CPAC is the Conservative Political Action Conference, an annual three-day festivus that's considered the best look into where the Republican party is headed. Thousands of future leaders descend on the Omni Shoreham Hotel to share their ideas, which range from "Vote for me in 2012" to "Vote for me in 2016 if I lose in 2012."
Fox News sure is having such a fun time at the kickoff today:
As I was walking toward the door carrying equipment Joe Scarborough walked past me. Some ambitious young aide quickly inserted himself between Joe and me as if he were Rihanna and I had Chris Brown intentions or something.
Ha ha, hooray!...??
The event's speakers include every Republican worth his or her salt, except for Bobby Jindal and Sarah Palin who are "too cool" (overexposed).
Things got off to an Important Intellectual start this morning with former Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee delivering his latest stand-up routine:
He said the free market should be permitted to engage in creative destruction to restore the economy to equilibrium. What's happening instead, he said, is the establishment of "socialist republics" in the United States.
"Lenin and Stalin would love this stuff," Huckabee declared.
He said the stimulus package should be called the Congressional Recovery Action Plan, because it smells like its acronym.
Don't miss a minute of this year's exciting poop-themed CPAC!
Jim Newell writes about C.R.A.P. for Wonkette and IvyGate.