D.C. Puts a Number on Its Happiness

It's not a great number

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Looks like residents of D.C. and Maryland are actually pretty miserable, at least according to a study published in Science Magazine. These melancholy scientists (or Scientists of Melancholia, we haven't decided yet) ranked the 50 states and the District in order of happiness. D.C. ranked 37, beating out Maryland at 40.

Or, as DCist puts it, "If the District ever had any southern charm, it's apparently long gone."

We're not sure if it's because D.C. is so close to the Salahis, or because we can't have a snowball fight without having a gun pointed at you, but either way, we're ready to call a therapist. Ironically, Virginia -- home of the Salahis -- ranked in at a much more respectable 28. Yeah, it's still in the bottom half, but those 27,000 Starbucks locations have to be cheering someone up.

The study focused on two sets of data, one about respondents' health and life satisfaction, the other consisting of objective indicators such as cost of living, crime rates and climate.

Yes, climate. And while there may be 860 feet of snow on the ground right now, we're betting that D.C.'s unofficial slogan "But It's a Wet, Sweaty Heat" probably isn't doing the District any favors, either.

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