Fairfax Rap Lays the Smack Down

Fairfax rap falls far short of the original. But we'll still crack a smile. A tuff smile 'cuz we're from the hood.

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    NEWSLETTERS

    youtube.com/DaBramahBull
    Whoever said chain restaurants weren't hardcore?

    There's only one reason we're surprised by the Fairfax Rap as a follow-up to the beloved and timeless Arlington Rap: That it took someone so long to create this parody of a parody.

    YouTube user DaBramahBull's Fairfax Rap hit the intertubes yesterday with such dazzling rhythmic analysis as, "Yeah, it's tough out here. We're only the second richest county in the U.S." Hey, wait a sec -- that doesn't even rhyme!

    OK, so maybe the follow-up to vidcomic Remy's more astute effort isn't as hardcore. "The McDonald's near my house ain't even 24 hours no mo'." See, we just MADE that rhyme.

    But DaBramahBull at least is able to explore his tough hood in terms of the Build-a-Bear workshop, bubblebaths, trampolines and ice cream cones.

    Then there are those black plastic buzzers you get while you're waiting at a chain restaurant. Yeah, man, those things are like what beepers were in the early '90s: "Y'all got Whitlow's, we got Coastal's. The food is great but there's an hourlong wait."

    We're still waiting for his punchline. Sigh. The sequels are never as good, are they?