Vote Milledge!

Minor leaguer could represent Nats in the All-Star Game

By CHRIS NEEDHAM

Updated 2:08 PM EST, Fri, May 8, 2009

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What would be a better symbol of the Nats' minor-leagueesque ineptitude than the team sending a minor leaguer to the All-Star Game?

Lastings Milledge -- who's currently buried (not literally) in Syracuse -- is on the ballot as one of the Nationals outfield options. The ballots, for some reason, are printed up about eight months in advance. At the time, Milledge was inked into the starting lineup as the team's leadoff hitter and centerfielder.

But after about a week of not hitting, not fielding, not giving-a-damning and not bothering to show up on time, the Nats sent him down, hoping he'd learn his lesson.

Now some Red Sox fans are hoping to get him elected to the game. Quoth the poster:

"As good citizens of NatsTown, I think we need to get as many Natinals [not-sic] on the All-Star team as possible.

"Specifically, Lastings Milledge is on the NL All-Star ballot. He needs to make the team. Nothing would be more NatsTown than having the Natinals' [not-sic] (lone?) All-Star game representative be a AAA player for whom the organization has no plan."

Some Nats fans, of course, are upset at the idea. Many of these same fans are the ones who can't figure out why ESPN tends to gloss over the games of this crapbag team.

But, really, what could be more appropriate? For a franchise that does basically everything wrong, it'd be absolutely perfect.

The odds of it happening, of course, are slim to none. Hockey's had the greatest track record for this kind of malfeasance -- especially those wacky Montreal fans.

Perhaps the greatest effort was the one for non-descript NHL defenseman Rory Fitzpatrick. Efforts to get him elected -- basically the equivalent of getting Saul Rivera into the MLB game -- were succeeding 'til the NHL mysteriously zapped some ballots un-rigging the contest.

So those Sox fans (and whatever homer Nats fans are left) have a long road ahead of them if they're going to make it work.

But if it works, it's pitch perfect for the N-AAA-tionals.

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Chris Needham used to write Capitol Punishment. He's thinking of writing in Pete Orr's name.