Prepare for More Orange Kids in Howard County

By Mike Tunison
|  Friday, Sep 18, 2009  |  Updated 12:31 PM EDT
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Prepare for More Orange Kids in Howard County

Get yer spray on, hon!

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Howard County is issuing a complete ban on the use of tanning beds by anyone under the age of 18. And they're not doing it to be fusty old killjoys. At least exclusively.

There is a suspected link between the use of the beds and the development of melanoma. Brittany Leitz, awarded Miss Maryland in 2006, contracted skin cancer by frequently using a tanning bed.

One wonders, then, if the effects are the same for people of all ages, why is the ban only for minors?  Because the county is fine with adults being all willy-nilly about contracting cancer?

Also, without tanning beds, where will pallid youngsters turn to bronze themselves? The sun?

Pfft. That thing's just as likely to give you skin cancer. Looks like the only viable safe solution will be spray-on tan products.

That's right. Howard County's keeping our kids safe, but only at the cost of turning them orange. Almost a fate worse than death.

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