Actress Stephanie March is moving forward from her split from chef Bobby Flay, despite the rough patches that the "Law & Order: Special Victims Unit" definitely hit along the way.
In a candid piece for Refinery 29, the 41-year-old actress opens up about getting plastic surgery at a time when everything in her life, marriage to Flay included, seemed to be "disintegrating." March knew from the start having breast augmentation in 2014 "was the wrong decision, for so many reasons" and went on to have her implants removed, but she isn't ashamed of her story or her scars.
As March explains, she went under the knife for the wrong reasons.
"Couldn't get a job I wanted on camera, couldn't get attention for my production projects, couldn't travel the world far enough or fast enough or immerse myself in philanthropy enough to make it all go away," she recalls. "It was like watching a glacier cleave into giant chunks: massive and seemingly well beyond my control. See, the other thing that was happening was that my marriage of nearly 10 years (and 14 together) was falling apart. And nothing, nothing was helping me cope..."
Because March could not fix it, any of it, she decided to try one last thing.
"I decided to change my body because I couldn't change my life," she said.
Initially, March was pleased with her decision. In five weeks, "I looked darn good," she wrote. "Skinny from my misery. Nice breasts from my wallet. My life may have been falling apart, but this? This was pretty good."
It was pretty good, that is, until two months in when March said she "sat up in bed and felt a sickening wet mucus sliding down my chest." One of her implants was infected and the seams of its scar had burst. She was rushed in for corrective surgery, and then she said she "had a hole in my breast for 6 weeks" before she "had the implant put back in." The second implant became infected, ruptured and was ultimately removed.
"The problem wasn't something anyone could have prevented or predicted. It was that I am allergic to implants. Plain and simple," she wrote. "My body did. Not. Want. Them."
So March had the implants removed, for good and accepted the experience.
"I refuse to be ashamed of it," she said.