Lady Gaga Reveals 'Pain' Before Oscars 2016 Performance: 'I Could Barely Get Myself Together' | NBC4 Washington

Lady Gaga Reveals 'Pain' Before Oscars 2016 Performance: 'I Could Barely Get Myself Together'

Oscar nominee opens up about the first day of rehearsals

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    Lady Gaga's performance at Sunday's Oscars left the audience reeling. Some in the crowed were spotted tearing up during her rendition of "Til It Happens to You," in which she brought rape survivors onstage.

    The Oscar-nominated song, co-written by Lady Gaga and Diane Warren, is featured in the "The Hunting Ground," a documentary about sexual assaults that occur on college campuses.

    Even though Mother Monster gave an epic performance, it was far from perfect on the first day of rehearsals. The 29-year-old star posted a photo of herself with a couple of the survivors on Instagram Tuesday morning and shared a very powerful message about the beginning of her preparations for the Oscars performance.

    "The first day of rehearsal with all the survivors I could barely get myself together. My body was wrecked with inflammation and pain, crying and shaking the whole walk to the stage," wrote Gaga, who has previously alluded to having Lupus. "The whole night before I did not sleep. The fear of knowing I would finally face that I belonged in that group. I told them I was so sorry I couldn't be Lady Gaga for them, that I couldn't even get dressed. I could barely get through the song, couldn't hit any of the high notes. Hair wet, sloppy tee shirt jeans uggs, tissues." 

     

    The first day of rehearsal with all the survivors I could barely get myself together. My body was wrecked with inflammation and pain, crying and shaking the whole walk to the stage. The whole night before I did not sleep. The fear of knowing I would finally face that I belonged in that group. I told them I was so sorry I couldn't be Lady Gaga for them, that I couldn't even get dressed. I could barely get through the song, couldn't hit any of the high notes. Hair wet, sloppy tee shirt jeans uggs, tissues. They all hugged me and told me that it was okay because it was more real this way, that they understood that they were in pain too. They told me they were there for me to support me because they believed this message needed to be heard. Without them I never could have felt strong. They accepted me for me, at my lowest and that was good enough for them, so somehow through the magic of their courage they made it good enough for me too.

    A photo posted by Lady Gaga (@ladygaga) on

     

    51 🤘🏼surviving and thriving

    A photo posted by Lady Gaga (@ladygaga) on

    Her fellow survivors came to her aid and helped her get through her tough first day because they could relate to what she was going through, too.

    "They all hugged me and told me that it was okay because it was more real this way, that they understood that they were in pain too. They told me they were there for me to support me because they believed this message needed to be heard," she continued. "Without them I never could have felt strong. They accepted me for me, at my lowest and that was good enough for them, so somehow through the magic of their courage they made it good enough for me too."

    At the end of her performance, Gaga walked away from her piano so she could stand beside and hold the hands of the survivors. 

    Before the awards show Sunday, Gaga sent a heartfelt tweet to Kesha, who is embroiled in an ongoing legal battle with music producer Dr. Luke, whom she claims sexually assaulted her. ".@kesharose I'll be thinking of u 2nite. This is not over we'll stand by u until you are free to live a HAPPY life. Everyone deserves that." Lady Gaga tweeted.

    PHOTOS: Lady Gaga & Taylor Kinney's cutest moments

    READ: Lady Gaga's Oscars performance inspires Jade Roper to reveal she was raped as a teenager